pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Randomize
