So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
