two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
