Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
