I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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