quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Randomize
