it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
