You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
