I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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