I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
and you fell through a lawn chair
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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