I want to stick my p in your. b.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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