Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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