On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
