She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
