Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
