4 words: hood of his car
my sisters under your porch take her home
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
