well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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