All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
sex in a hospital.. check
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize