yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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