Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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