they need to just BURY HIM!
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
