tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
