i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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