So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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