Soap is not a condiment
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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