I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
You can't just leave with hair like that
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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