So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
