Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
high people should be assigned attendants
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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