I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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