So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
