Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
