areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
