We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
