I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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