New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
