Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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