Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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