He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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