I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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