i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
