Sorry, I don't speak sober.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
