It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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