why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
