I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
im holly from the hills drunk
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
