Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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