My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
