just come out here and I will go home with you...
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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