I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
