So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Randomize
