Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize