We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
